Quick tips for holding onto happiness in the new year!!!

So often women find themselves in my office because they have lost their “happy”.  We have all kinds of profound conversations about what triggered the deep sadness, or anxiety, and what is contributing to it now.  We often explore old patterns and look at toxic relationships.  We examine their give and receive ratio (how much they are giving out to others, and how much they are allowing themselves to receive).   However, when it comes to feeling better quickly, we always have to go back to the basics….

1. SMILE often and especially in the mirror!  Yes, you are going to feel ridiculous, so just get over itJ  Muscle memory is a powerful thing, and you have every happy, joyful feeling stored in your cheek muscles.  So every time you go to smile, even if you aren’t in a particularly happy mood, you are triggering JOY.  The same way watching a fast food commercial can trigger a terrible craving for a mountain of French fries, smiling will trigger happy feelings.   Even better if you do it while looking in the mirror.  When you see yourself smiling, you are sending a powerful message to your subconscious mind that you are happy!  Your subconscious receives this info and then acts accordingly by sending out the powerful happy chemicals like serotonin!  Who doesn’t want that?!

 

2. At the beginning of your day, intend to BE HAPPINESS.  Take a minute in the morning in the shower to picture yourself throughout your day HAPPY.  What does happiness today look like, sound like, feel like?  Intend for nothing to get in the way of your happiness.  Intend to spread this happiness everywhere you go today.  Choose to spread positivity and be intentional about not going to the dark side (no complaining, criticizing, or negative statements today)!

 

3. Dress in colors that make you feel HAPPY, JOYOUS, & BEAUTIFUL!  Colors are one of the fastest ways to invite in new and happy energy.  When you are getting dressed in the morning, if your priority is to be happy, you should choose colors that make you feel happy.

 

4. Take 2 minutes out of your day to have compassion for yourself.  Most women look at me with a confused look when I say this….it’s alright if you are feeling confused a bit about what this looks like.  Stay with me!  Take 2 minutes or more to sit down by yourself and think about all that you have accomplished or dealt with today.  Put your hand over your heart and intend to send yourself some love.  The same way you would put an arm around a friend to comfort them.  If you are a visual person, picture your love as a color.  Send yourself bright pink and breath in this love and compassion in and out, until you are surrounded completely in this color.

 

5. Give yourself reminders around your house, office, and car, of your intentions to be happy.  You might write, “Today, I choose to live in limitless JOY!” on the bathroom mirror.  A good rule of thumb for any affirmation is that you say it to yourself, and then you take a deep breath and breathe it in to the deepest part of your soul, and say it again after your exhalation.

 

6. GET MOVING!  It doesn’t matter how you choose to do it, but choose to do it for 30mins a day.  You can dance, do some yoga, go for a walk or run, but get your body moving.  When your body is getting some healthy movement once per day, it is physically healthier and is better equipped to hold onto that happy feeling!

Happiness is a vibration like anything else.  It is an unconditional friend that will always come back to you when it is invited.  Intend to live it today, and watch how quickly you enjoy the benefits of its presence.  You so deserve in every way to be happy!

LOVE, LOVE LOVE AND HAPPINESS TO YOU!

Erin Williams, LMSW, BCD, CHt

www.healingplacecounseling.com

Erin Williams encouargement, Happiness, insight, positive thinking, Self love

Romcoms?  Starbucks?  Dinner with great friends?  Hiking in the mountains?  Dancing around the house…naked?  The holiday decorations at Macy’s?

This is a time to be unabashedly honest with yourself and NO JUDGEMENT ALLOWED!  Every time I sit down with someone in my cozy office (presently glowing with holiday decorations), this question inevitably comes up. 

“What brings you joy?” 

For a lot of people, the answer is, “I’m really not sure.”  I often get people staring at me in a state of wonder…wondering why answering this question hasn’t been more important to them before. 

Here is why taking the time to answer this question is indeed soooo important; it’s because, if we want to invite more JOY into our lives, we first have to know what makes us FEEL JOYOUS!  So how do we go about finding our joy?  The first step is to go out there and EXPLORE your world with fresh eyes, and a totally open heart.  Yes, I completely appreciate that this may sound a bit cliché and cheesy even.  However, hopefully you can get past that and really hear what I am asking you to do.  Exploring your world may mean, stepping outside of your comfort zone and trying new things.  If you find yourself sabotaging your attempts to explore, by hearing and inner monologue something like, “don’t try that you will hate it…” and so on, tell yourself, “thank you for sharing, but people change and I’m going to try it anyways.”

The fact that people are changing all the time, is a really important thing to take into account while exploring for joy.  People do change and something that you may not have enjoyed at one point may be something that you would really love now.   This is why having fresh eyes, and an open heart is so important while doing this!  One way to encourage yourself to explore your world a bit more, is to make a list of things you want to do this season.  It may look like…

1. Go Ice Skating, or a hike, or a walk on the beach (depends where you live)
2. See a holiday concert or show
3. Meet a friend for hot chocolate at a new coffee shop
4. Look at Ticketmaster and buy tickets to an event
5. Go to the Art Museum
6. Send out an inspiring email to your friends and family 
7. Try a winter sport that you thought you would never do
8. Go to a  holiday party that you would originally have declined
9. Go Christmas shopping in a town or city you haven’t been to yet
10. Take a kid (yours or borrow one) to see Santa

Your list can look like anything you want! So start exploring and getting to know yourself a bit more.  Start every morning with, “Hello JOY, this is _________, I want to formally invite you to spend the day with me.”  Will you feel a bit silly doing this?  Most likely, yes.  But, isn’t being silly a great way to invoke the energy of joy?

Wishing you a season of unlimited JOY!

Erin Williams, LMSW, BCD, CHt

www.healingplacecounseling.com

Erin Williams, Insight, JOY, inspiration, motivation joy

Learning to derive power from taking responsibility for your life, while refusing to take responsibility for someone else’s

by Erin Williams, LMSW, BCD, CHt

          “Who is responsible for this?”  The answers to the question will vary, and most certainly reflect our relationship with ourselves and others.  Some jump quickly to stoically answer, “Me, me!  I take full responsibility.”  Others may respond in a bit more slowly with, “No way.  I am certainly not responsible for THAT!”  Either way, how we decide what we are responsible for completely shapes our relationships, our work, family, and feelings about ourselves. 

We are going to simplify what seems to be a pretty complex topic!  It doesn’t have to be so messy!  So let’s clean it up!  First, ladies, I want you to set the intention right now that you are going to commit to having a healthy relationship with RESPONSIBILITY. 

Here is how it is done…..

STEP 1.  I,__________, commit to taking responsibility for my life, my emotions, thoughts, and actions.  

STEP 2.  I accept that I have control over my life and how I react to what’s happening in it, at any moment. 

STEP 3. I, ________,  REFUSE to take responsibility for anyone else’s feelings, thoughts, actions, or inactions.  WOW!  That’s powerful!!!  Now, we have a pretty solid starting off point!  The basics of responsibility are that we own our own thoughts and feelings, and how they shape our life, but we do not extend that responsibility to others. 

There are two extremes to watch out for…..  

1.  You never take responsibility for anything.   If this is the case, you are giving away the power you have to change your life for the better.  You are also living life hoping, more than acting.  You may feel powerless and angry that things are not going your way, but have not realized that YOU have the power to turn things around.  Start by learning about the “law of attraction”, then commit to a few mantras to increase your personal power.  You might try; “I embrace my personal power, good things are coming to me, and I intentionally follow my bliss now.  I am responsible for my own happiness and I choose happiness now.” 

2.  You take responsibility for everything and everyone.  If this is the case, your intentions may be good, but you most likely feel energetically depleted.  You may be giving off the impression that you can do it all, while feeling tired and resentful!  The first thing to do to correct this is to set the intention to STOP taking responsibility for everything and everyone.  You may then want to explore a bit about why you do this.  Get out a piece of paper and write down, “I SHOULD…”, then fill in everything that comes to mind.  Now write down “I WANT…,” and fill in everything.   Look at the different lists.  Ask yourself where all those shoulds come from?  Do you secretly feel not worthy of your wants?  Do you feel not deserving of them?  Are you feeling like you have to help everyone or else no one will?  Really sit with all the things that come up for you. 

Now, try this concept on for size; everyone is here on a journey to work out the things they need to work out.  If you take away their responsibility, you are taking away the gift that will surely come with learning that lesson.  Try these mantras; “I now release that situation completely with love.  Everyone is responsible for themselves equally.  We all make our own happiness and unhappiness.  I now take responsibility for myself, and detach from all others.  I live in bliss and attract limitless joy.”

As you examine your relationship with responsibility, be patient with yourself.  Developing a beautiful relationship takes time and nurturing.  The issue of responsibility can be a deep one, so if you feel so compelled to explore it further, sit down with a counselor and see what comes out!  I know I am biased, but I think it is such a cool and amazing process!  You will be amazed at the wonderful and interesting things you learn about yourself.  Choose to see yourself and all that you learn through clear and compassionate eyes.

Wishing you all the love, joy, and abundance in the world!

Erin Williams, LMSW, BCD, CHt

http://healingplacecounseling.com/

Erin Williams change, encouargement, insight, inspiration, Self love

by Erin Williams, LMSW, BCD

….And put yourself behind the glass with the other valuables! Often times we get confused about what being “strong and independent women” means. We think that we have to do everything, be everything, and rely on no one. What typically happens is we end up feeling used and our needs discarded. We put our own needs last trying to be super woman, and are surprised when other people put our needs last too. They are simply following our example and placing us on the discount rack, because we are not taking the time to up our own value. The good news is that this can be quickly remedied! We must first start by honoring our own needs, and valuing our time, emotions, and bodies. The rest of the world will easily follow suit.

You may find yourself falling back into your old habits of neglecting YOU. When this happens, STOP, and simply ask yourself what you need to feel good today. You may even create a list for yourself with some healthy options like nap, healthy snack, exercise, massage, talk to a friend, therapy appointment, yoga, date, etc. It may sound silly, but if you are not accustomed to taking excellent care of yourself, you may need a few options to pick from. Sooner than later, you will get soooo good at taking care of yourself that this process will happen automatically in your head, and you-won’t-need-no stinking-list!

When you take the time to up your value, sit back and watch the world admire you. Watch as doors open for you, help magically appears, and you are feeling good, respected, and appreciated the entire time. Eleanor Roosevelt said, “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent,” smart lady, that Eleanor.

Wishing you an abundance of Joy this week,

Erin Williams, LMSW, BCD, CHt
www.healingplacecounseling.com

Erin Williams awakening, encouargement, insight, inspiration, Self love

She is sooo important to all of us…

Dear YOU,

            Please take excellent care of yourself.  You were given this one body and person to care for in this lifetime.  Take a moment and look at her in the mirror.  This woman staring back at you is responsible for so many other human beings on this planet.  She affects so many different people.  She cares for their physical, mental, and emotional needs.  It is absolutely essential that you take care of HER.  Please make sure that her needs are getting met.  Please make sure that she is safe, happy, and healthy.  Please ensure that she is getting enough rest and nurturance.  This woman staring back at you is such a valuable part of our society that we now plead to you to hold the absolute highest standards for her.  Place her behind the glass where the valuables are.  Shower her with love, affection, and ensure she is surrounded by people that have the highest and best intentions for her.  She is simply too important to us all for anything beneath this standard of care.

I thank you for your cooperation in this effort to care for her. 

Most Sincerely,

Erin Williams, LMSW, BCD

http://www.healingplacecounseling.com

Erin Williams encouargement, insight, motivation, Self love, taking care of you

By Erin Williams, LMSW, BCD

We acknowledge the existence of subtle vibes all the time….”oh, that place just gave me a bad feeling,” or “I just get a good vibe from her.”  Subtle energy is everywhere, and some of us are just more sensitive to it than others.  Sometimes it feels good, and sometimes it feels bad.  One thing that is often overlooked is how powerful those subtle vibes become when they are powered by intention.  When you pair intention with energy it becomes modern day magic!

            Here is how it works; let’s say there is a person or situation that needs some healing.  What sometimes happens is that we feel sorry for that person, or become frustrated by the situation, so we actually are sending negative energy into it.  We vent about it or indulge our deepest negative emotions.  Not only are we sending out negativity, but we are actually getting weighed down by it ourselves.  Try turning this around by visualizing the person or the situation healed.  Intentionally send it LOVE.  What color is your love?  To me, love is magenta, so when I am intentionally sending love, I will surround that person or situation with a beautiful magenta bubble.  Since energy works based on intention, that energy gets sent and infuses and surrounds the situation with compassion and love.  It truly is a modern day love spell!

            If you are having an argument with someone, surround them with your love color.  You could also try writing their initials down on a piece of paper and set and intention for more balance and harmony.  Another spell you may like is picturing the situation exactly as you would like it to be in your mind’s eye, and then surround it with love.  Say to yourself, “it is done,” and release it.  Your intentions are so powerful that you will find miracles begin to follow you everywhere you go!  Let me know how it works for you!

Love and light to you,

Erin

www.healingplacecounseling.com

Erin Williams, Uncategorized love, Miracles

I have recently be the recipient of some absolute miracles.  Some I feel comfortable sharing, and others although truly profound and amazing, I would like to keep to myself.  It got me thinking about manifestation, the law of attraction, believing in higher power, and how it all plays into my everyday life.  Here is what I am presently learning in this part of my journey;  as your mind opens up to new and miraculous ways of living your life, and you are truly able to let go of limited thinking, ABUNDANCE & LOVE fills all the corners of your being.

Now, this is something I really thought I understood when I started on this path of spirituality and self-realization.  However, I am continuously surprised by all the miracles around every corner as I continue to let things, people, situations, feelings, and old thoughts go!  It’s cleaning out your closet more and more and realizing that your new best friend (who happens to have amazing taste and is very generous) keeps filling it with the most beautiful things as you get rid of the old stuff. 

I know that the more we notice and show gratitude for the miracles in our lives, the more they fill our lives.  So let’s all take a moment to think about and feel gratitude for all the blessings and miracles in our lives…..and now TELL US ABOUT THEM!  We want to share in all of those good feelings and gratitude.  So let’s here it!  We will all be inspired by hearing about them, and it will propel us into a state of gratitude and abundance thinking!

I wrote recently about seeing my first angel, and that was truly a miracle, but I have had so many subtle and beautiful miracles since then.  My most recent miracle was finding a baby bird yesterday with my 4 year old daughter right next to our car as we were on our way to Tae Kwon Doe class.  It was still alive and we couldn’t find the nest, so we scooped it up and put it in a shoe box on a hand towel.  We then drove Tweety Bird, as my daughter named him an hour to a nature center in Howell, Michigan that takes wild animals and rehabs them until they are healthy and strong enough to go out on their own.  We left there both feeling so good about helping and were so grateful to the women at the center for helping us out.  It truly made our week!  Miracles…

Love and light,

Erin Williams, LMSW, BCD

www.healingplacecounseling.com

Erin Williams Miracles

by Erin Williams

The power of surrounding yourself with GOOD VIBES is truly infinite.  Good Vibes can change your physical, emotional, and mental health, and positively affect your relationships and life in the grandest ways.  So how does it work?  It all starts with this super fascinating concept called entrainment.  Entrainment is simply the tendency for two or more rhythms to synchronize to each other.  It is a universal principle and applies to chemistry, pharmacology, biology, medicine, psychology, and so on. 

The classic example of how entrainment works shows individual pulsing heart muscle cells that when they are brought close together, begin pulsing in synchrony. Another example of the entrainment effect is women who live in the same household often find that their menstrual cycles will coincide,(www.soundfeelings.com) or when grandfather clocks are brought together, they start swinging and chiming at the same time.

            To go one step further in understanding how this affects how you feel, you have to understand that our brains operate on 4 main different frequencies. Alpha—when we are super amped, feeling intense, stressed, anxious or concentrating really hard.  Beta—working our brain at an average level.  Theta—feeling really good and really, really relaxed, and Delta—deep sleep, when we experience REM.  When we are in Theta and Delta our bodies naturally repair themselves.  Thus, when we don’t get enough sleep, we get sick and don’t feel good….not enough Theta and Delta. 

            So how does this affect how you feel?  A better question would be how doesn’t it affect how you feel?  Look at the people you surround yourself with.  Are they happy, positive people that feel good emotionally, mentally, and physically?  Now understanding that our bodies, brains, and emotional frequencies actually synch into each other when we spend a lot of time together, you can understand why choosing happy friends affects your health.

            Look at how the concept of entrainment affects you with the music you listen to, television you watch, things you choose to read.  Your brain actually changes to synch into that vibration, and this affects how you emotionally, mentally, and physically feel.  Feeling sad, listen to happy music…it actually changes your brain to vibrate on a happy level.  Feeling stressed or sick, listen to music with delta and theta tones.  You are actually slowing your brain waves down and telling your body to begin repairing itself!

            The good news is that by knowing this, it is great motivation to surround yourself with GOOD VIBES!  Play beautiful music and surround yourself with wonderful people.  Choose your television and anything you choose to read carefully.  Surround yourself with GOOD VIBES and watch how it changes your life in the most magnificent ways!  You deserve all the happiness in the world! 

Infinite love and gratitude,

Erin Williams, LMSW, BCD, CHt

www.healingplacecounseling.com

Erin Williams encouargement, good vibrations, inspiration, motivation, positive energy

                                                                by Erin Williams

            I have always felt drawn to angels, even as a young child.  My mother had them displayed in her artwork all over our house as we were growing up.  I have always felt connected to my angels, praying to them and asking them for guidance whenever I needed their help. 

            I remember being in Istanbul, Turkey last year and touring Hagia Sophia, a beautiful church facing the Blue Mosque in the center of the city.  It is one of the only religious buildings that has changed hands between the Christians and Muslims several times, so it actually depicts Muslim and Christian art side by side.  Throughout the centuries, and all the changing of hands, one piece of art never changed…the angels.  The Church director explained to me that the existence of Angels is the one thing that all religions can agree upon.  So four beautiful angels are depicted in the four corners of the main dome and have remained throughout it all.  Throughout battles, fires, and drastically different religious orders, these angels have remained.  How beautiful, I thought. 

            My knowledge and trust in their existence was always just faith…faith in the Divine, until I actually saw my first angel.  I have no idea how you will receive this.  Maybe you have also had experiences like this as well, maybe even more profound.  As for me, even though I had always led a very intuitive existence and felt a deep connection to Spirit, I had never actually seen anything with my physical eyes.  That is, until then. 

            My husband was out for the evening and I had just finished reading Sleeping Beauty to my daughter (she has a taste for the Disney classics). I quietly closed the door to her room and sat down at my dining room table.  It had been a particularly difficult day, but nothing to out of the ordinary.   I sat at the end of my table facing one of the chairs that was pulled out a bit and angled in my direction.  That is when she first appeared.  In the chair across from me, I saw iridescent, transparent energy in the shape of a big beautiful angel.   It wasn’t as profound as you may have thought.  I sat there just staring, thinking “is this really happening?!!” At one point, I actually took the paper that was close to me and began sketching what I was seeing.  It was like begin able to see the vibration of beautiful music in the shape of an angel right there in the chair next to me.  I felt wonder, validation, comfort and a really deep and profound sense of support.  It lasted about one minute, but at the risk of sounding very cliché, it felt like an hour.

            Since then, my ability to connect with the Angel realm and sync to my intuition during counseling and when I need it, has expanded dramatically.  The one thing I would like to convey to you about your angels is to talk to them.  They are indeed a real part of our lives, and they are there to help.  I am still so grateful that my angel appeared to me on an ordinary weekday.  My message in that has always been, you don’t have to be in such a desperate state to receive Divine support or help.  The only thing that must happen in order for us to feel this connection and support, is that WE HAVE TO ASK FOR IT.  Remember to ask.  Then trust and know that your prayers are ALWAYS HEARD and ALWAYS ANSWERED.  The answers my not come the way you thought they would, but they always do come.  Remember to ask your angels for help with the everyday stuff to.  Also, never worry that you will be taking them away from more important things when you ask for everyday support.  They are not bound by time and space, so they are able to be in an infinite amount of places.  Thus, angels are able to help everyone simultaneously….pretty cool actually.

            It is my hope that this will spark your own renewed connections to your angels.  They are there with you.  They are listening, and they love, love, LOVE you unconditionally!  See yourself as they do….as a perfect, beautiful, and Divine being that is infinitely supported on an amazing journey. 

Wishing you love, light, and bliss!

Erin Williams, LMSW, BCD, CHt

www.healingplacecounseling.com

Erin Williams angels, believe, magical

by Erin Williams

I was recently at Starbucks with my good friend Georgia, sipping our lattes laughing, and talking about life.  At one point in the conversation, Georgia introduced me to one of her favorite quotes, “Who were you before you started putting yourself last?”  I can’t seem to get it out of my mind.  It brings up some really great questions.   For some of us, we’ve been putting ourselves last for so long, that we truly cannot remember who we were before that!  This powerful question deserves some pause, and certainly an answer. 

                So I ask you, “Who were you before you started putting yourself last?”  Were you vibrant, happy, beautiful, and full of life and love?  Were you energized and radiant?  Close your eyes and picture her.  See and feel what it is to be her.  How does she look?  How does she sound when she speaks?  What does her laugh sound like?  What is she wearing, doing, and saying?  How does she feel?  Now, take a few deep breaths and breathe her in.  She is you.  Plain and simple.  Just think about how many people benefit from basking in her radiance.  That radiance is a gift that needs to be protected and nurtured, and you my friend need to do the nurturing! 

                Invest in yourself!  Join us on our Women’s Goddess Retreat to Santorini, Greece, or pamper yourself at the spa, or take yourself on your own rejuvenating trip.   Treat yourself now in small and grand ways!  Ask yourself every day, what do I need today in order to feel good, nurtured, and happy?  Feel what it is like to be your best self again.  You are amazing, inside and out.  Your needs are important too!  If you don’t put yourself first, no one else will!  You are beautiful and divine, and deserve all the happiness and bliss in the world. 

Love and light,

Erin Williams, LMSW, BCD, CHth

www.healingplacecounseling.com

Erin Williams Greece, nurturing, self