Photography by David Lawn

The Parable of the Raft is probably one of the most famous parables taught by the Buddha. He compared his own teachings to a raft that could be used to cross the river, but should be discarded when one made it safely to the other shore. 

A man is trapped on one side of a fast-flowing river. Where he stands, there is great danger and uncertainty – but on the far side of the river, there is safety. But there is no bridge or ferry for crossing. So the man gathers logs, leaves, twigs, and vines and is able to fashion a raft, sturdy enough to carry him to the other shore. By lying on the raft and using his arms to paddle, he crosses the river to safety. 

The Buddha then asks the listeners a question: “What would you think if the man, having crossed over the river, then said to himself, ‘Oh, this raft has served me so well, I should strap it on to my back and carry it over land now?’” The Monk replied that it would not be very sensible to cling to the raft in such a way. 

The Buddha continues: “What if he lay the raft down gratefully, thinking that this raft has served him well, but is no longer of use and can thus be laid down upon the shore?”

The monks replied that this would be the proper attitude.

The Buddha concluded by saying, “So it is with my teachings, which are like a raft, and are for crossing over with — not for seizing hold of.”  

So at that I crossover to another part of my life – no need to cling to the things you love but to let them free in order for them to take on a new life for themselves.  

I have followed different personal development blogs over the years and have grown and learned from so many of them. It’s all been said, in one blog or another. The advice offered is splendid but how many of us truly want to create change? How many truly want to get out of their comfort zones? Each one offers different perspectives, different solutions to issues, different ways on how to “get happy.”

So now I will include my list of perspectives on life and what I’ve learned through my amazing journey with MakeGirlfriends.

My list of transformation and growth

1. Live Simply – if that means put everything in storage and move every 4-6 months – go for it – it’s not all about the destination but the journey that makes us who we are. Ghandi stated, “Live simply so others can simply live.”

2. Live in the Present Moment - for this is truly what we have is the “moment”. We may have illusions of time but it’s all about the moment, I have a very good friend that would remind me, where are your shoes right now – I would say right here – that is where the moment lies.

3. No Judgment – stop judging others and it will be easier to stop judging yourself.

4. Forgive and Let Go - forgiveness is an act of self love and to truly forgive allows us to let go.

5. No Obligations – meaning do things out of LOVE and not GUILT.

6. LOVE – really and truly LOVE – for LOVE is the basis of everything beautiful and we are LOVE at our core! See through a child’s eyes. Be thrilled and excited about life. Find miracles everywhere. We are all capable of grand LOVE. Open your heart to LOVE!

7. NO FEAR – There are 2 human emotions FEAR or LOVE – you choose! When you operate from fear there is no love and when you operate from love there is no fear.

8. You are the Author of your life – Live out your life as if you are writing your life story.

9. Too much FUN is never enough! – no need to explain this one so give yourself permission to have FUN.

10. Stop and smell the flowers always – not when there is time but always; make yourself STOP!

11. Be TRUE to yourself – live in that authentic truth to yourself and you will never have to remember the lies to keep a story straight.

12. Live by the Four Agreements – 1) Impeccable Word, 2) Don’t take anything personally, 3) Never make assumptions, 4) Always do your best.

13. Live, Laugh and Dance as if today was your last day on earth.

14. Buy the SHOES!

15. Courage – never be afraid to tell the truth for it takes courage to speak in the truth and can change a life.

Brené Brown, Ph.D. writes, “Courage originally meant ‘To speak one’s mind by telling all one’s heart.’ Over time, this definition has changed, and today, courage is more synonymous with being heroic. Heroics is important and we certainly need heroes, but I think we’ve lost touch with the idea that speaking honestly and openly about who we are, about what we’re feeling, and about our experiences (good and bad) is the definition of courage.”

16. Take care of your body – You only have one body and it’s your temple; look good and feel good for yourself first. Exercise and eating healthy is key.

17. I AM Statements – the power of the word from the beginning of time. I AM THAT I AM!

18. Gratitude – live in an attitude of gratitude – the more we are grateful for the more will come into our lives that we can be grateful of. Know that I am grateful for all of you that have followed me and have taken the time to comment on my blog posts.

19. Being Happy is a CHOICE – you choose!

20. Peace, Harmony, Happiness and LOVE to each one of you – living in love and light.

In case anyone is asking why are you letting MakeGirlfriends.com go? I have been thinking of letting go for a many months now and here are some of the reasons:

1. When I realized that habit was taking over my passion for writing posts that’s a true sign to observe and do something different. Habit makes you continue to do things over and over and expecting different results – wait, isn’t that the definition of Insanity?

2. I spent so much time, energy and money on this website and I started to cling to that fact instead and I continued to post blogs due to that fact.

3. Letting Go = Failure (EGO talking) – In reality – LETTING GO = FREEDOM

4. Trusting that when you say “no” to what doesn’t serve you, life says “yes” to your greatness.

I read recently a quote from Abraham: There are no choices that are really a detour that will take you far from where you’re wanting to be because your Inner Being is always guiding you to the next, and the next, and the next. So don’t be concerned that you may make a fatal choice because there aren’t any of those. You are always finding your balance. It’s a never ending process.

I have made incredible relationships through the blogging community, I’ve had the pleasure of meeting Corinne Edwards, Kelly Rudolph, Maureen Simon and Nicole Rushin. I have not met Galen Pearl, Alex Blackwell, David Stephens, Martin and Pam Clooney, Irving from Hans of Harmony and Debbie Bills. All of these people work very hard on their blogs and I celebrate their work.

So now I take all the time I’ve spent on blogging and writing for my blog and will dedicate that time to writing my book that has been in progress for about 2 years now. I am in the creative collaboration stage so I am a little reluctant to give you the title. I ask that you stay in touch for I would love to hear about your lives. I will continue to follow your blog posts but won’t feel the pressure of having to respond, picking and choosing what I would like to read. Living in line with my truth. I will now have more time with face to face and eye to eye interaction with people I meet.

So now I introduce you to the first person that came to my “heart” Nathalie Villeneuve. She started the group on facebook named “The Women of Facebook” and she will continue this beautiful space of love and passion with MakeGirlfriends.com. Nathalie will not be changing the name of the site.

I will have the pleasure of introducing Nathalie next week to you all. My final day will be August 1, 2012.

I introduce you to Nathalie Villeneuve

Peace, Harmony, Happiness, Love to all of you and……as always, I sign off by saying:

Accountability, Appreciation, Celebration, Change, Closure, Comfort Zone, encouragement, Friends, gratitude, Happiness, inspiration, JOY, Living in the moment, love, motivation, new beginnings, passion, Power of words, Spirit of a woman, The Five Agreements, Think Big, Truth acceptance, appreciation, awakening, change, encouargement, friendships, Girlfriends, gratitude, Happiness, illumination, impeccable word, insight, inspiration, joy, love, motivation, positive thinking, revelation, Self love, Truth

Love is too rare and special to make up artificial rules that ignore the magical illogic of the human heart. Mark David Gerson

What happens when love is not enough to sustain a relationship?

This past week I have been immersed with people coming into my life that are in relationships that probably should have ended a long time ago. They love that person and yet it’s not quite enough to stay. As these stories unravel, I reflect on my own life.

My girlfriend in California – Giovanna- gave me these words of wisdom:

We are all on the same journey. We take different avenues, making stops, perhaps staying in a neighborhood or relationship too long. Eventually we all get there. Women (the feminine essence of spirit) are very good in seeing the potential in men and believing love will be enough to “fix” their partner. What often time happens in the relationship, when the fix does not happen fast enough or at all over time, the masculine energy in us starts coming out through nagging, blaming, expecting or a plethora of other things that operate from the negative. This pushes the man and the relationship away. We as women must remain in our power of the feminine through speaking from the heart and from our own truth.

Love Simply Is….We cannot “fix”

Simply No Expectations….

By living in our truth we learn to communicate in positive ways. Stating what is on our minds in a gentle, loving way. Nagging, blaming are catabolic reactions. We can learn to communicate by simply stating…….WHAT IS….

Why then at times is love not enough?

Potential: Because often we meet someone who is on a different level then we are and we see something in that person – we see their spirit, their potential. They may not be ready for what we have to make the change to operate from a higher vibration. Remember, we are mirrors and reflections of each other so we attract into our world what we see with our eyes that we need in order to learn and grow.

Timing: It may not be the “right” time yet, perfect nonetheless, for in every relationship there is a lesson to be learned for that time in our lives.

This is the part where we hold love “loosely.” We end up hanging on too long because we don’t want to hurt, disappoint, be alone, lose the house, the stuff in it and the memories of what was.

Life is to be experienced not haphazardly but in full joy and bliss! We all have the potential for bliss, and truly how many of us allow ourselves to go to a place of bliss and dance from our inner spirit. To live in the possibilities of life and all it’s adventures that it has to offer. To live from our imaginations. Like Albert Einstein once so eloquently stated, “imagination is more important than knowledge.”

I read this recently:

“Are we being driven by love or by a lie of obligations?”

This takes me to the next part of this article:

To love is to know when to let go and set it free so that person can grow according to HIS purpose and design. This takes courage.

The more open–hearted and vulnerable I am to love that enters my world and I remain as if I was an open vessel, it will and can transform me.

Love is a transformational force of nature.

The love that led to my marriage became the pain of its dissolution. The joy experienced by being with my grown children is also the heartache of our parting. We must taste the salt of our tears to know the sweetness of life. For life is forever sweet!

Love brings about intense joy as well as intense pain. This is the conundrum of this FOUR letter word that carries so much weight. If we can only remind ourselves that in this time of pain and letting go we open our hearts even more….more….and some more. The flip side of not opening up our hearts is closing our hearts and the cause of a closed heart is resentment, bitterness and more pain – and eventually shutting your heart to love even more.

I choose to be the open vessel when love comes calling. I welcome it with a gentle smile, gleaming eyes and know that through every relationship we are only learning to love even more.

LOVE SIMPLY IS…..TO BE LIVED PASSIONATELY AND ON FIRE FOR ALL HUMANKIND WHILE STAYING IN OUR TRUTH

LOVE IS THE ENERGY THAT FUELS EVERYTHING AND CHANGES EVERYTHING FOR WE ALL ARE LOVE

Remember, may the possibilities of today excite us all!

encouragement, Happiness, Insight, inspiration, love change, encouargement, Happiness, insight, inspiration, love, motivation, positive thinking

I think I must let go.  Must fear not, must be quiet so that my children can hear the sound of Creation and dance the dance that is in them…….  Russell Hoban

For many years now I have stated, I’m not into Hallmark holidays – Isn’t everday a Hallmark holiday?  Why do we take one day and celebrate it with a card, a gift and flowers – creating pressures on family members to hurry here or there in order to not disappoint. 

I see life as a celebration within itself –

So today I want to do something a little different – instead of my children honoring me, I want to honor my children.  They have bought me such JOY and LOVE into my life.  

I always wanted to be a mother and at the age of 22 I had my daughter Amanda.  Two years later I had my son Kevin.  You may say, “WOW – you were young” – and YES I was young.  I wouldn’t change it for the world.  I grew up with my children and now when I go out with my daughter, we often get the question, “are you friends.”  Of course, we are!  Then comes my son and when I got out with him, that’s funny – he gets asked, “Is she your girlfriend?”  That makes my day!!! (Thank you Kevin for putting up with the question asked by many).

They are such a blessing.  They have watched me go through difficulty, pain and on the flip side – they have watched me blossom into the woman that I am today.

They both have beautiful spirits – their energy is contagious.  They are very different and yet in their core very much alike; compassionate, loving, kind, intelligent with hearts of GOLD.

I am very proud of you both for your accomplishments.  I’ve learned so much from watching them grow up.  They have been my bright spot in many storms and have always been there to share laughs and encouragement.

Amanda and Kevin you are both my gifts and because of you I’ve had my greatest pleasure of being called MOM – YOUR MOM!

Remember, may the possibilities of today excite you!

gratitude, JOY, love gratitude, joy, love

Virginia Woolf stated, “Arrange whatever pieces come your way, and make it work for you.”

I was talking to one of my girlfriends about emotions, feelings, and life in general. We all go through trials, challenges, joys, happiness, pain, and tears in the course of our lives. We mentioned how we all are broken pieces of tiles put together like a mosaic.

I thought as we talked about our spirits resembling broken pieces, and stated; the broken pieces are our life mosaic. We take all of the broken/wounded pieces, we put them together gently, and we make a beautiful mosaic. I love the way a mosaic looks, with every piece exactly where it belongs. We must not fall apart when challenges come our way, but instead we gather up our thoughts and emotions, glue them gently back together, and in so doing we create a beautiful tapestry that is forever evolving! One that is stronger and more vibrant. I call this OUR STORY…..

By changing our attitudes – the way we think and focus on the positive instead of the negative, we are on our way to changing our perspective and taking the broken pieces and making something incredibly beautiful! 

What I find is that we are prone to becoming victim to circumstance; the “poor me” syndrome. We encounter a hard time with a situation in life, we allow depression, anger and/or anxiety to set in, and like an evil monster it doesn’t leave. We so desperately want it to leave, but we live in darkness for so long that we forget the resources available to us, and don’t see the ray of light on the horizon. We spiral into the dark abyss and forget that there are other ways of thinking that are more functional, more positive. The darkness will subside if we connect with the positive things in our life, and remind ourselves daily that attitude is everything. It’s not what happens to you but how you react to what happens to you that matters.

Having an attitude of gratitude…….takes the blues away!

We make things so hard, but surely they don’t have to be that way. Remember what I said in the beginning of this post, we are intended to be beautiful mosaics. We must honor and respect ourselves in such a way that we truly BELIEVE we are! 

Remember, may the possibilities of today excite us all!

encouragement, gratitude, inspiration, love, Uncategorized awakening, encouargement, gratitude, inspiration, positive thinking, Self love

Happy Valentine’s Day – I thought a blog post on love would be appropriate for this day of LOVE - Hugh Prather in his book, “The Quiet Answer” states……

 “Love should be as effortless as breathing and as indiscriminate as falling snow.  Love is a state of mind or a vision that handles all things equally.  There is only one kind of love, the uncalculated kind.”

The word alone – LOVE – sets our minds dancing.  It stirs emotions in us and brings us to a state of bliss.  People talk about falling in love or like I often say rising in love –(it’s a more positive way of stating an action).  I reflect on Hugh Prather’s quote as I earlier stated and one thing that resonates in me:

Love should be as effortless as breathing and as indiscriminate as falling snow. 

If we took this statement and really contemplated it –

Then why do we make love so hard?  Why does it have to be so complex? 

Love involves the heart – to me it’s like a heartbeat – never skips a beat and always constant – without it we would be dead.  It’s as profound as the ocean in depth and its currents ebbs and flows – ebbs and flows.  Love is a selfless act – so many books, poems, songs and articles are written on this subject. 

We are all curious about it and lucky the ones that have truly loved and felt loved.  I am happy to report that I have been one.

Love triggers endorphins in our brains – we can’t stop thinking of that person, we imagine ourselves in their presence even when we’re not together.  It makes you feel happy and giddy.  I would simply describe it as magical.  You want to be in each other’s daily lives. 

There are so many types of love – romantic love, agape love, love for a child, love for our families, love for a stranger, and love for our friends; each stirring up different emotions and feelings.  As I sit and write this, I am watching and admiring a vast ocean and I am in love with the beauty of nature;  with the sun and its rays twinkling like fairy dust upon its surface.  As each new day dawns the love of life that’s experienced.  I just told an old friend this morning – I believe in love and have so much love to give – my heart is filled with it…….

There’s nothing more beautiful than seeing two people in love. 

For those who want love in your lives, I suggest you start visualizing what it looks like to you.  Call it onto yourself – it’s magical – be patient – it will come!  One thing that I ask is that you don’t settle – you deserve exactly what you want.  Trust your heart and believe that he’s out there especially for you.  Call it what you wish – the Law of Attraction, the Power of the Universe or as simple as I BELIEVE in LOVE for we are made in the image of LOVE!

Sometimes you have to love yourself and that other person to let them go if you are in a toxic relationship.  At this point, it’s also love to let go…..

Before I end this blog on love – one most important thing – you MUST learn to love yourself before you can ever love another.  In the movie Jerry McGuire he tells Renee Zellweger – “You Complete Me” – I say, no one can complete you but certainly can strengthen you – so maybe a better line would be – “You Strengthen Me” – but you know Hollywood and completions sounds better than strengthening…..You must complete yourself before anyone else can complete you.   So like I often say my religion is love, love and more love.  You can never give enough love; so GIVE, GIVE and GIVE some more!

Remember, may the possibilities of love today excite us all!

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David,  a very special man in my life, went to Guatemala in October on a mission trip with a team of 14 to build homes for widows and their children.  In a week’s time the team built 4 homes.  They gave these widows and their children a better place to live for their future.  I’m sure they ALL experienced the Spirit of Gratitude; the ones building the homes and the ones receiving this GIFT! 

So I thought this post would be appropriate for this “Thanks-Giving”…..A time when we reflect on our gratitude…..My desire for each one of you is that you relish in life’s banquet today…..

David took this photograph which I have named, the “Bubble of Hope.”  I reflected upon my childhood and how a bottle of bubbles would keep me occupied.  Oh, the simple joy of pulling the stick out of the bottle and forming that most perfect bubble.  I discovered as I would blow bubble after bubble that you had to calculate your breath in just the right rhythm to accomplish getting a magnificent bubble as shown in this picture.  It’s said that a picture holds a thousand words and this picture immediately spoke to me upon seeing it.

I haven’t blown a bubble in a while and I think it’s time to blow some bubbles!

As I look at this picture and ponder on my words stirring in my head ~ I see a little girl with her hands being raised to the sky ~ I’m sure in pure bliss of the moment.  I also see a beautiful little boy with captivating black eyes looking up to the circle of love as his eyes reveal the soul of his ancestry.  I see the iridescent bubble representing unbridled joy.  Joy is not lost; it floated away in the sunlight of his life.  Notice the colors in this picture.

The space between the eyes of the little boy and the weathered hands of the little girl is the gap.  The gap where the moment lies; where breath, air and love for that moment created this most fabulous bubble floating towards the heavens along with their prayers. 

What would the prayer be if a prayer was to be attached to this bubble of hope floating to heaven?

Would it be prayers of gratitude and love?  Would it be prayers of hope and joy? Would it be prayers of happiness and freedom?  What would your prayer be?

Notice the smile on the little boys face, he’s joyful and he is waiting patiently to have his turn at creating the most perfect bubble in time.

A simple bubble – and the joy it creates. 

A wonderful reminder of how grateful I am for my breath and the ability to love each moment  which is truly a GIFT to me.

How much breath will you put forth to create the most perfect of bubbles?  Will you put out with force, for those are the times that the bubble folds and resist the breath? Will you put out with a gentleness allowing the breath to build slow and easy, with patience?  To have patience with our breath and the desire to create that amazing bubble allows the bubble to form and gently move toward the sky.

So this Thanksgiving, I want to take this opportunity to allow my breath to tell you how grateful I am for your support, your encouraging words to me, and for being there to read my posts when they are published.  For allowing yourself to be inspired, and inspiring me at the same time.

You are each a GIFT and know that I am GRATEFUL!

Let’s remember that the only way to find happiness is not to expect
gratitude–but to give for the joy of giving.

Special thanks to you David for capturing with your eagle eye this portrait of unbridled bliss…..

THE PERFECT CIRCLE OF LOVE AND GRATITUDE

REMEMBER, MAY THE POSSIBILITIES OF TODAY EXCITE YOU!

gratitude, Hope, love encouargement, gratitude, inspiration, love

Unchained Melody ~ I invite you to watch the music video and feel the love….dedicated to each one of you that know love or have experienced love……

If one wishes to know love, one must live love, in action.  Leo Buscaglia

We are all born from Gods’ love – we die with Gods’ love and we do all we can do to find love in between our birth and our death.  Searching, seeking and longing for that true love……we were created to LOVE….

What is it about LOVE and why is it so hard to find?

I’m certain there are thousands upon thousands of stories written on the subject of ecstacy and longing.  Music galore about rising in love or falling out of love and many sonnets written about the heart connection.

We find love, we spend time with love, and know this must be LOVE, and then we do all we can to sabotage love, and walk away from it, in order to go find a more suitable love, for we think the grass is greener on the other side.    

I really don’t get it – Do you?

Is love an emotion, a feeling, a verb or noun?  The road to love can be long or not so long, can be lovely, can be adventurous, can be filled with joy or pain, can be a multitude of things.  I looked up the definition of love and this is what I found.  Love is a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.  When I Googled, “What is it about love,” I found:  QUIZ: Is it Love?  WOW – now you can take a quiz to make sure it’s love! (I’m not sure if I want to do that)…..

Scientists say that the brain chemistry of infatuation is akin to mental illness – which gives new meaning to “madly in love.”

Love is about how the other person makes you feel.  The fact of the matter is that love involves non-verbal reactions – synaptic (chemical) connections within our brains.  Since I love to research, I did some research on LOVE. 

I discovered that the species that stick to one mate usually have a rich flow of another chemical called vasopressin, the “monogamy” chemical.  Experiments done with males injected with this chemical brought out all the evidence needed.  Isolating males before and after mating, he was indifferent to all females.  But 24 hours after mating, he is hooked for life.  The jealous husband syndrome sets in too.

Another chemical is oxytocin, the “cuddling” chemical.  It promotes the need to be physically held, have close contact with the mater, and makes the sexes more caring.  It can be released simply by a lover’s look, smell or even a fantasy.

When infatuation subsides, another chemical takes over which is responsible for intimate relationships, these chemicals are created by endorphins.  They make a relationship steadier, intimate, dependable, warm and a great sharing experience.  They do not induce a giddy high, but calmness and stability….hence the reason why people stay married.  This chemical is addictive so the longer a couple stays married, the longer two people stay together.  It is endorphins that trigger grief on a spouse’s death or long separation, those yearnings for togetherness.  Adrenaline love is being in love with the idea of being in love.  With endorphin love, we like loving someone. 

There are foods that can intensify love…..

We eat aphrodisiacs (named after the Greek Goddess of Love – Aphrodite) to enhance love:  chocolate, oysters, turtle eggs eaten raw with salt and lime (haven’t tried this one yet); asparagus, almonds, avocado, bananas, basil, figs, garlic and honey.  It was suggested by a very “special man” in my life – “Why not prepare a dinner to include each of these foods?”

Now that we know about the chemicals and foods involved in the “love” process:

What is it about love and the longing to have it in our lives?

There are so many dating sites to meet the “ONE” but yet we are lonelier and lonelier as a society.  Here are a few statistics from Match.com:  People over age 50 makes up Match.com’s fastest growing segment of users, with a 300% increase since 2000. 

WHAT is that all about?

Is it because our biological clocks of younger years is ticking away and we wake up one day with more wrinkles and the reality that we are not getting any younger and no one to share our golden years with…..

I WANT A PARTNER/MATE NOW SYNDROME?

 75% of women and 81% of men in their 50s experience a serious, exclusive relationship after a divorce.  (this to me is great news)

There really are a lot of fish in the sea:  According to the Census Bureau, 29% of adults age 45-59 are now single, compared with only 19% in 1980. 

I listen to so many single women and I hear, “Where are the men?” I listen to so many single men and they say, “Where are the women?”  They must “NOT” be out there since I’m hearing the same thing from both sexes; or are they and the real reason we haven’t found the ONE for us is because we have been so busy in dating so many men and men women, that it’s been a distraction in truly discovering ourselves out and working on US?  I read in Don Miguel Ruiz book, The Mastery of Love that we must be 100% complete in ourselves in order to attract that perfect one for you.   Once you accept yourself just the way you are, the next step is to accept your partner.

It makes sense to me, does it you?

If you have the eyes of love, you just see love wherever you are, even in the imperfect – Wabi Sabi.  When you perceive with the eyes of love, you can connect your will with the will of another dreamer, and the dream becomes ONE.  Then you can see with the eyes of an eagle or transform into any kind of life.  With your love you connect with the eagle and you become the wings.  But to do this, you need to clean the mind of fear and perceive with the eyes of love.  If you can open your heart completely to your partner, you can reach heaven through your love.

When we fulfill the needs of our mind and our body, our eyes see with love.  We see God everywhere.  I love what Don Miguel Ruiz says, “But when we know that our heart is a magical kitchen, we are always generous, and our love is completely unconditional.”  I love the anology of our heart being a magical kitchen…..

I believe we have this “Jerry McGuire” notion of love in the famous line from the movie where Tom Cruise tells Renee Zellweger , “You complete me.”  Are you kidding me – why did they not edit that line from the movie?  Hey, it’s Hollywood and they can say anything to make us say, “AWWWWWHHHHHH – why doesn’t anyone say that to me????”  So we look for someone that can say to us, “You complete me.”  I believe a better term may be – “You compliment me.”……. It truly is a beautiful gift to us when we compliment and not complete.  I much rather use the term from the movie, “As Good As It Gets” where Jack Nicholson tells Helen Hunt, “you make me want to be a better man.”

Once we awaken to self and clean up our houses (our temples -mind and body), then the awakening is like being at a party where there are hundreds of people and everyone is drunk except you.  You are the only sober person at the party.  Most humans see the world through their emotional wounds, through their emotional poison.  Here lies the problem of not being awake and aware.

When in the awakened state, your heart is an expression of the Spirit, an expression of Love, an expression of Life.  It’s being aware that you are Life.  When you are aware that you are the force that is Life, anything is possible.  Miracles happen all the time, because those miracles are performed by the heart.  The heart is in communion with the human soul, and when the heart speaks even with the resistance of the mind, something inside you changes; your heart opens another heart, and TRUE LOVE is possible.  It’s in opening another’s heart there lies the chemicals, the passion, the Love that we are ALL either trying to find or keep.

My girlfriend Giovanna stated it so eloquently to me this past week, “almost all relationships start with what can I “get” from it rather then what can I “bring” to it; I believe that we have to be selfless and selfishness abounds us these days….the other part is to choose wisely.  We tend to choose what is familiar to us whether it feels good or not because it is what we know…we change it by our thoughts about ourselves, our actions and constant vigilance of those thoughts…..BELIEVE IN YOURSELF!

WE MUST FEEL WORTHY OF LOVE FOR LOVE TO COME…..

Love enables you to stand for yourself in an honorable and gracious way; with no hidden agendas; with no room for negativity.  In its purest form – UNCONDITIONAL!  My friend Jimmy has a website Life Architects and stated it this way on my guest blogger Angie’s comments on, “Only Time Can Reveal If It’s Real“:  “true love is attached to us with invisible ties. These ties connect our spirits and souls that only we can understand.”

For the MAGIC of love and the volumes written and sung about it; it continues to afflict us generation after generation.

So the bottom line in all this LOVE talk is we are put on this earth to experience LOVE in its purest form – to get closer to our GOD for HIS love is unconditional – and in so doing we discover that HE is LOVE, LIGHT and TRUTH – all the things that we search for in a lifetime are all wrapped up in our Divine.  We crave all these things in human form – so it is in acquiring the eyes of GOD and having your eyes fixed on HIM, then this should make the love process easier to find and keep, for love never fails…..  

Where there is GREAT LOVE, there are GREAT MIRACLES…..

L’amore vince tutto (Love conquers all)…. (Italian)

I invite you to share your thoughts on this?

Remember, may the possibilities of today excite us all!

inspiration, love encouargement, inspiration, love, motivation, Self love

Hello Girlfriends – I first heard about Wabi Sabi love on a Soulmate Summit email that I received from Arielle Ford.  Arielle Ford wrote a book entitled, Wabi Sabi Love.  The term Wabi Sabi means finding perfection and beauty in imperfection.  The answer to the universal dilemma and struggle of living and ultimately loving another person!  Finding beauty and grace in things modest, humble, and unconventional.  Wabi Sabi holds the key to everlasting love.  From an engineering or design point of view, “wabi” may be interpreted as the imperfect quality of any object, due to inevitable limitations in design and construction/manufacture especially with respect to unpredictable or changing usage conditions.

So I ask the question, “How many of us live in Wabi Sabi?  How much more beautiful would this world be if we made a choice to live in a Wabi Sabi sort of way?  Are we not on a path of finding everlasting love?  Isn’t this our true calling in life?

Wabi Sabi is equated to a piece of pottery from the engineering or design point of view.  It’s the imperfect that brings out the beauty in a piece of clay.  As we are being formed and shaped in our lives and we go through bumps and bruises along the way, isn’t it the imperfect beings that we truly are that brings out the perfect over time through love and more love.  Refining ourselves in such a way that the imperfections are truly perfections!

Mother Teresa comes to mind as I write of this type of love.  She found the beauty and grace in humans that were modest, humble and unconventional.  She is a perfect example of everlasting love!  Now Mother Teresa is an exceptional example, and I venture to say that most of us probably never met her, but we have heard countless stories of her love. 

Can you think of people that you have encountered during your life that love in this manner?

As we go through life we encounter people everyday – it’s so easy to make quick judgments, to find something wrong with that person.  I truly believe that to love with the eyes of a child is Wabi Sabi.  They have no expectations – they live in a world of surprises and they are masters in living in the moment. 

It’s wiser not to expect but to hope, for in expecting you ask for disappointment, whereas in hoping you invite surprise.

To find beauty in the imperfect in life I feel is easily said, but hard to do.  Our experiences, our beliefs, our pains, our pasts all play into this.

So how do we begin focusing to see the perfect in the imperfect?  One word –

L O V E

When our hearts and minds are in alignment to our Source, our Divine, our GOD – then we can experience this type of Wabi Sabi love. 

It’s living in the space of peace and love which brings joy and happiness.

Now it’s unrealistic to think we can love all people and all things.  Afterall, we are not SAINTS. 

Can we  judge less and see more through the eyes of a child? 

Can we train ourselves in seeing the perfect in the imperfect? 

When we meet new people, how about seeing one or two things that you like about them instead of the litany of things you don’t like about them?

It truly is a beautiful world and at times when it doesn’t seem so beautiful, can you at least find Wabi Sabi love out of your everyday life?  You will be surprised by how your thoughts will change by seeing life through the eyes of this type of love.  How about allowing Wabi Sabi to start with ourselves.  Start to see the perfect and beauty in our own imperfection. 

I would love to hear your comments and thoughts about this type of love?

Remember, may the possibilities of today excite you!

love love, Self love, Wabi Sabi Love

Hello Girlfriends – “What the caterpillar calls the end, the rest of the world calls a butterfly.” ~Lao Tzu~

I presented the question in the title, “Can every day be a new beginning?”  I would imagine the way this question is answered depends on many factors.

I personally choose to find new beginnings in every day.  As the sun rises each day so do we rise each day.  Have you ever watched a sunrise or a sunset for a few days in a row?  You notice its bright colors; you notice the hues of reds, purples, coral; the lines, the majestic awakening of the senses; the awe that is before you.

Take that same sunrise or sunset and let’s create that space of new beginnings.  Our universe gives us new beginnings with the dawn of each new day.  Why can’t we give ourselves new beginnings with the dawn of each new day?

Why do we at times hold on to the memories of the past and make them our new beginnings and then we feel stuck?

I know for myself, I have been in several relationships where it was difficult to let go because of the amazing memories.  I credit the help of my 29 year old daughter that helped me realize I held on to these dead end relationships because I was in love with the memory of what we had together.  Instead of observing this non functioning relationship and seeing it for what it truly is at the time, I instead was “in love” with the memory of “what could have been.”  RED FLAG!

A new beginning then creates a space of love, kindness, compassion for us.  WE let go of what does not serve us anymore and prepares a way for possibilities yet to come.  The key is letting go so we can be in a place to have the “NEW” enter our lives.  This goes for relationships, jobs, anger, resentment, selfishness and the past.  There are many exercises and meditations in letting go.  However you choose to get there is up to you, but letting go is a MUST in order for us to move on to the possibilities that our universe has to offer.

Be good to yourself my friends…..

Remember, may the possibilities of today lead us to new beginnings…..

encouragement, inspiration, love, new beginnings encouragement, friendships, inspiration, love, motivation, new beginnings

Hello Girlfriends – I wrote several blogs ago, “Don’t be afraid to ask for help.”  Well, I’m going to continue along these lines.  Asking for help is a little different than allowing to be taken care of by others. 

Knowing you can care for yourself but allowing to be taken care of.

To allow our significant others, our girlfriends, our mothers, fathers, sisters, family to come to us and do things for us is priceless.  Not asking for help but allow the “Power of Receiving” and accepting this gift of being taken care of.

You may be asking what do you mean by being taken care of?  Well, this can be a simple gesture from a neighbor taking out your trash, picking up your mail or newspaper, to having someone volunteer to fix you dinner and bring it over to you or watch your children for a few hours while you take care of yourself.

Such a lovely thing to have someone unexpectedly bring you flowers, or cook a meal since they know you’ve been extremely busy at work.

How do you react when someone wants to do something wonderful for you? 

Do you accept graciously and say “thank you.”

Do you feel as if you have to reciprocate immediately? 

Do you not know what to say and end up saying, “you didn’t have to do this for me but it’s very kind nonetheless?” 

Next time this happens to you watch and feel your reaction to this kindness. 

For myself, I tell that person how grateful I am for their presence in my life and I simply smile in joy.  I call these wonderful surprises in life “GOD WINKS.”

Now of course it goes both ways, you too can do a kind gesture for others.  It’s always so much more gratifying to give then to receive.

Would love to hear your comments on how you feel when someone comes along and wants to take care of you?

Remember, may the possibilities of today excite us all!

Friends, help, inspiration, love, motivation, power of receiving being taken care of